While technology connects us, it also has a paradoxical effect on our social lives. Social media platforms often create superficial connections that lack depth and intimacy. The constant comparison to others’ seemingly perfect lives can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy and loneliness. This is most prevalent among children and young adults. If you’re over the age of 27, you probably remember a time when you had to go outside to play. Those days of playing tag, riding bikes with friends, or having family gatherings where old stories were shared seem to be fading. Today, children and young adults are creating fewer real-life connections. The virtual and digital world is no replacement for face-to-face interaction. The Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) highlights that “loneliness and social isolation in childhood increase the risk of depression and anxiety both immediately and well into the future.” With more than one in five adults and more than one in three young adults living with a mental illness in the U.S., addressing loneliness and isolation is critical to addressing the mental health crisis in America.

Modern lifestyles have led to more people living alone, working remotely, and experiencing fewer face-to-face interactions. The decline of communal spaces and social organizations further isolates individuals. Maybe you went away for school, got a good job in a different state, or perhaps you’re an immigrant who moved to a new country for a better life. These are brave decisions that should be commended. If this relates to you, pat yourself on the back. Not many people take these steps, and not many know the challenges that come with moving away and living alone. Starting over and creating a community in a new environment is difficult. Culture, food, and the environment change, but most importantly, family and friends are not around. These are perfect ingredients for isolation and loneliness. Current research suggests that immigrant and LGBTQ+ populations experience loneliness more often than other groups. Latino immigrants, for example, have fewer social ties and lower levels of social integration than U.S.-born Latinos. First-generation immigrants face stressors that can increase their social isolation, such as language barriers and differences in community and family dynamics. Similarly, gay, lesbian, and bisexual populations tend to experience more loneliness than their heterosexual peers due to stigma, discrimination, and barriers to care, according to the HHS.

Societal stigmas around mental health prevent many from seeking help for their feelings of loneliness. This is especially true for men, who may feel pressured to conform to traditional notions of masculinity that discourage expressing vulnerability. This one hit closer to home. Growing up, I saw this firsthand with my father, a truck driver who often spent up to 16 hours a day driving, only to come home to sleep. For years, this was his life. I never once saw or heard him complain, but the depression was all over him. On days that I would see my father, I’d find him in his room, drinking whisky and staring blankly at the TV. It was as if he was begging for someone to recognize his hard work, to be reminded that he was loved, just begging for meaningful connection. At the time, I didn’t know how to express those things to him because it had never been expressed to me, and I certainly never heard anyone around me showing that type of emotional connection. The lack of communication and vulnerability prevented us from building that meaningful connection that might have alleviated his loneliness.